Summary of Book "You Can Win " By Shiv Khera

                                         You Can Win 

ABOUT THE BOOK:
Name: You Can Win: A step by step tool for top achievers
Author: Shiv Khera

Chapter 1: Building a positive attitude

In this chapter author shares a story of a man who sells different color balloons at fair, whenever his business used to go down, in order to tackle that situation he used to fly one balloon in the air, so that when children see that balloon in air, they feel like buying it, with this technique his sales again used to go up, one day when he was selling his balloon one boy came near him and asked him, “IF YOU RELEASE A BLACK BALLOON, WOULD THAT ALSO FLY.” That balloon seller moved by that boy’s concern, for this, that man replied With empathy, ”SON, IT IS NOT THE COLOR OF THE BALLOON, IT IS WHAT IS INSIDE THAT MAKES IT GO UP.”

With this story author want us to know that this man saying applies in our lives as well,  It is what is inside that counts, author says that thing inside us what makes us go up is our attitude, author says that have you ever wondered why some people organizations or businesses or countries are more successful than others? Author says the reason for this is very simple, the people who become successful is because they simply think and act of that thinking effectively, author says that one day when he asked a question to two executives that if they would have magic wand what will they ask from that wand, will they ask for profit or huge success or for what, after listening to an answer of those executives he was really very impressed, answer was that people should have better attitude, they will ask for better attitude because better and best attitude can make person a good and successful person.

Author says that people’s attitude contributes to success,  as per a study was done by Harvard University, they say 85 percent people get a job because of their attitude, and only 15 percent of people get a job because they are smart or intelligent.

Chapter 2: Acres of Diamonds

In this chapter author had shared a story related to farmer,  author says there was a farmer in Africa who was happy and content, that farmer was happy because he was content and he was content because he was happy, one day a wise man came to that farmer and told him about the glory of diamonds and the power that goes along with them,  the wise man said that if he had a diamond size of his thumb that he will get his own city and if he would have a diamond size of a fist then he can buy his own country, listening to this that farmer wasn’t able to sleep whole night, he became discontent, and because of this discontent behavior he was unhappy.

The next day immediately after waking up, that farmer left his family and sold his entire farm and moved out in search of diamond, after searching whole Africa he didn’t found anything and when he returned to his home place he was financially destroyed and also lost his whole happiness, he started feeling unhappy and lost, so finally he committed suicide.

The person who bought first farmer farm was watering the camels at a stream, when he was working on that land he found some shining stone, he took that stone and kept it at his home, when wise man came to meet first farmer, he saw that stone, that wise man asked the new owner is the earlier farmer has come home? For this new owner replies no but why you asking this, for this that wise man says that I can see the diamond which I have asked him to search, for this new owner says no its not a diamond but a normal shining stone , and my entire farm which I have bought from earlier farmer is filled with such shining stone, when that farmer took that wise man to his farm, he told him that these are diamonds not stone, after analyzing that farm properly they came to know that farm was covered with wcres and acres of diamonds.

After sharing this story author ask us to find 5 morals of this story

So let’s discuss the morals as per author

1. When our attitude is right, we realize that we are all walking on acres and acres of diamonds.
2. The grass on the other side always looks greener
3. Author says that every person in this world like grass on the other side, means when you like someone else’s grass then someone else also likes some other persons grass.
4. Author says that when person don’t know how to recognize opportunity, they complain of noise when it knocks.
5. The same opportunity never knocks twice, the next opportunity can be better or worse but it can never be the same.

Chapter 3: Factors that determine our attitude

Author says primarily factors that determine our attitude:

1. Environment
2. Experience
3. Education

Under Environment comes home, school, work, media,  culture, Religion, tradition, Social environment and political environment.

Experience

Author says our behavior changes according to our experience with people and events in our lives, if we have positive experience with people then our attitude also becomes positive.

Education

Here author talks about formal and informal education, here author is not only talking about academic qualifications or degrees, here author is talking about knowledge which gives wisdom and ensures success.

This is the short summary of You Can Win. 

Thankyou

Quotes from "Power Of Habit" by Charles Duhigg

•“The brains dependence on automatic routines can be dangerous. Habits are often as much a curse as a benefit.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“Cravings are what drive habits.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“It seems ridiculously simple, but once you’re aware of how your habit works, once you recognize the cues and rewards, you’re halfway to changing it.”

— Nathan Arzin,The Power of Habit

•“When people join groups where change seems possible, the potential for that change to occur becomes more real.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“A habit cannot be eradicated – it must, instead, be replaced.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“Habits are most malleable when the Golden Rule of habit change is applied: If we keep the same cue and the same reward, a new routine can be inserted.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“The habits that matter the most are the ones that, when they start to shift, dislodge and remake other patterns.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“Routines are the organisational analogue of habits.”

— Geoffrey Hodgson,The Power of Habit

•“When people start habitually exercising, even as infrequently as once a week, they start changing other, unrelated patterns in their lives, often unknowingly. Typically, people who exercise start eating better and becoming more productive at work. They smoke less and show more patience with colleagues and family. They use their credit cards less frequently and say they feel less stressed. It’s not completely clear why But for many people, exercise is a keystone habit that triggers widespread change.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“Families who habitually eat dinner together seem to raise children with better homework skills, higher grades, greater emotional control, and more confidence.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“Making your bed every morning is correlated with better productivity, a greater sense of well-being, and stronger skills at sticking with a budget.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“Keystone habits offer what is known within academic literature as ‘small wins.’ They help other habits to flourish by creating new structures, and they establish cultures where change becomes contagious.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“Willpower is the single most important keystone habit for individual success.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“Among the most important benefits of routines [(organisational habits)] is that they create truces between potentially warring groups or individuals within an organisation” [Is the same true for potentially warring parts within us?]

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“Good leaders seize crises to remake organisational habits [and] crises are such valuable opportunities that a wise leader often prolongs a sense of emergency on purpose.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“People’s buying habits are more likely to change when they go through a major life event [and] there’s almost no greater upheaval for customers than the arrival of a new child.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“People, it turns out, often go to the gym looking for a human connection, not a treadmill.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“To sell a new habit… wrap it in something that people already know and like.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“A movement starts because of the social habits of friendship and the strong ties between close acquaintances.
It grows because of the habits of a community, and the weak ties that hold neighbourhoods and clans together.
And it endures because a movement’s leaders give participants new habits that create a fresh sense of identity and a feeling of ownership.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

•“All our life, so far as it has definite form, is but a mass of habits – practical, emotional, and intellectual – systematically organized for our weal or woe, and bearing us irresistibly toward our destiny, whatever the latter may be.”

— William James,The Power of Habit

•“There are these two young fish swimming along and they happen to meet an older fish swimming the other way, who nods at them and says ‘Morning, boys. How’s the water?’ And the two young fish swim on for a bit, and then eventually one of them looks over at the other and goes ‘What the hell is water?'”

— David Foster Wallace,The Power of Habit

•“Water hollows out for itself a channel, which grows broader and deeper; and, after having ceased to flow, it resumes, when it flows again, the path traced by itself before.”

— William James,The Power of Habit

•“Some habits yield easily to analysis and influence. Others are more complex and obstinate, and require prolonged study. And for others, change is a process that never fully concludes.”

— Charles Duhigg,The Power of Habit

Short summary of book "The Power Of Habit" by Charles Duhigg

The power of habit 

NAMED ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR BY The Wall Street Journal • Financial Times
 
In The Power of Habit, award-winning business reporter Charles Duhigg takes us to the thrilling edge of scientific discoveries that explain why habits exist and how they can be changed. Distilling vast amounts of information into engrossing narratives that take us from the boardrooms of Procter & Gamble to the sidelines of the NFL to the front lines of the civil rights movement, Duhigg presents a whole new understanding of human nature and its potential. At its core, The Power of Habit contains an exhilarating argument: The key to exercising regularly, losing weight, being more productive, and achieving success is understanding how habits work. As Duhigg shows, by harnessing this new science, we can transform our businesses, our communities, and our lives.

In this book ,Author Charles Duhigg said ,40 percent of everything which we do is based on our habits which we have formed since our childhood. The author further says that because we do not understand the brain hence we don’t understand how habits get formed and how to break them.

Usually we have a misconception that bad habits can’t be broken, but as per author Bad habits can be broken, author states that several habits can be broken at the same time, this book will help you to understand why habits  are at the core of everything you do, how you can change them and what impact that will have in your life, your business and your society.

Three important things which you can learn from this book is That Habit works in 3-step loops: Cue, Routine and Reward.

Any person can change their habit just by substituting one part of the loop, the routine.

Willpower is the most important habit, you need to form or reshaped your habit.

let’s understand the book in more detail

•The Habit LOOP (How Habit Works)

The author says that there’s a process in which brain converts a sequence of actions into an automatic routine is known as Chunking, and it’s the root of how habit forms, the author says that there are hundreds if not dozens of behavioral chunks that we rely on every day, for example, after waking up in the morning there are certain routine which you follow always without even thinking of it such as getting up then brushing teeth, automatically putting toothpaste on your toothbrush before sticking it in your mouth,

some habits are difficult, some actions become your habit only after putting efforts into learning it, for example, driving a car, when you were learning car at first it required a lot of focused and concentration, but later with regular practice, it became your habit, but later ones you become pro into it, ones it becomes your habit, you easily drive a car onto the street with hardly any street. The Routine occurs by habit.

scientists say that habits emerge because the brain is constantly looking for ways to save the efforts, left to its own devices, the brain will try to make almost any routine into a habit.

The author says that Habit works on Cue, Routine, and Reward, Cue Is what Triggers you to do the habit.

The Routine is the behavior you then automatically engage in, and lastly, you will receive the reward for completing the routine.

•The Craving Brain ( How to Create New Habits)

In this chapter, the author has shared a success story of Hopkins,  one day in the earlier 1900’s, The Prominent American Executive named Claude C.Hopkins was approached by an old friend with a new business idea, his friend approached Hopkin with an amazing product which he was convinced that it will for sure going to hit, and that product was(toothpaste) Pepsodent, Hopkins at the time was at the top of booming industry, Hopkin was at the peak of his career, however at first he wasn’t convinced with his friend product, and also said No at first, but after looking his friend consistency of approaching him again and again, He said yes with an agreement of giving six month’s option on a blocked stock, this turns out to be the best and the wisest financial decision of Hopkin’s life, Hopkins turned Pepsodent as one of the best product on the earth within 5 years of that partnership.

Hopkin is best known for how to create new habits among customers, he says that the secret of his success was that he had found certain cue and reward that fueled a particular habit, how Hopkins created new habits among customers, He created Cravings And that craving, it turns out, is what makes cues and rewards work. That craving is what powers the habit loop.

Throughout his career, one of Claude Hopkins’s signature tactics was to find simple triggers to convince consumers to use his product every day. He sold Quaker Oats, for instance, as a breakfast cereal that could provide energy for twenty- four hours— but only if you ate a bowl every morning.

•The Golden Rule of Habit Change 

The trick to changing a habit then is to switch the routine and leave everything else intact.

The author also shares how you can improve your willpower, however, willpower is the most important thing which we need for forming or replacing the habit.

Three things can be done to improve willpower

1)do something that requires a lot of self-discipline.

2) plan ahead for worst-case-scenarios.

3)preserve an autonomy.

How to win friends and influence people (part-2)

This post is the second part of "how to win friends and influence people" post.

In this post I will share some more principles from that book which were not covered in the previous post and learning these principles can be our good and easy effort to be better.Using these principles you can make people to like you and they can be your sheet anchor.Even a reticent can have a word with their colleages or anyone whom they want to talk by applying these principles.

•Give honest and sincere appreciation:-The deepest urge in human nature is the desire to be important ,the desire to be great. Every normal human likes a compliment and feels good when you praise them.

The desire for a feeling of importance is one of the prime distinguishing feature between mankind and the animals,this desire makes you want to wear the trending styles, drive the latest bikes,cars and talk about your brilliant children and their achievements. Honest appreciation got results where criticism and ridicule failed. People will remember you when you give honest and sincere appreciation, people will cherish your words and repeat them years after you have forgotten them.

•Talk in terms of the other person's interests:- A mistake that everyone makes while interacting with others is that they talk with respect to their own interests but we do not know that other person is interested in our words or not.To make the person interested in you, break the ice by talking in terms of interest of person you are interacting with.  

•Show respect for the other person's opinions, never say "you are wrong":- This is the common mistake that every person make in their day to day life.If we are not satisfied with someone's opinions we directly say "you are wrong".

•Be Quick To Acknowledge Your Own Mistakes :-  Nothing will make people less defensive and more agreeable than you being humble and reasonable enough to admit your own mistakes. Having strong and stable personal and professional relationships relies on you taking responsibility for your actions, especially your mistakes. Nothing will help end tension or a disagreement more than a swift acknowledgment and apology on your part. 

•Don’t Attempt To “Win” An Argument:-  The best way to win any argument, Carnegie writes, is to avoid it.Even if you completely dismantle someone’s argument with objective facts, you won’t be any closer to reaching an agreement than if you made personal arguments. Carnegie cited an old saying: “A man convinced against his will/Is of the same opinion still.”  

The Alchemist Quotes Explained

The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

1. “…whoever you are, or whatever it is that you do, when you really want something, it's because that desire originated in the soul of the universe. It's your mission on earth."

2. “…every blessing ignored becomes a curse. I don't want anything else in life. But you are forcing me to look at wealth and at horizons that I have never known. Now that I have seen them, and now that I see how immense my possibilities are, I'm going to feel worse than I did before you arrived. Because I know the things I should be able to accomplish, and I don't want to do so.”

3. “We are afraid of losing what we have, whether it’s our life or our possessions or our property. But this fear evaporates when we understand that our life stories and the history of the world were written by the same hand.”

4. “The alchemists spent years in their laboratories, observing the fire that purified the metals. They spent so much time close to the fire that gradually they gave up the vanities of the world. They discovered that the purification of the metals had led to a purification of themselves.”

5. “What you still need to know is this: before a dream is realized, the Soul of the World tests everything that was learned along the way. It does this not because it is evil, but so that we can, in addition to realizing our dreams, master the lessons we’ve learned as we’ve moved toward that dream. That’s the point at which, as we say in the language of the desert, one ‘dies of thirst just when the palm trees have appeared on the horizon.’
“Every search begins with beginner’s luck. And every search ends with the victor’s being severely tested.”

I'M ALWAYS CORRECT

"I'm always correct,I do not commit mistake,everyone should listen to me. If they listen to me, they will learn something good and I will change their thinking.Even if I commit a mistake , nobody will come to know about it because I can change things in my favour by imposing these mistakes on others."

We all are surrounded by such type of people who thinks that they are supreme among everyone.In day to day life, sooner or later we have faced such type of bigots who always criticise people who are not satisfied with their views .

So,what is correct?what is wrong? Who will decide.is there any ideal person in the world whose thinking and lifestyle can be set as a parameter to decide what is wrong and what is right.if any, please tell us.

I think there is no ideal person who is not criticized by anyone. Every person is good for some folks and bad for some folks because every person has both positive and negative points. Those who criticize someone because they keep in mind only negative points of them, so anyone can be criticized and anyone can be praised. I think Even God is not ideal because people who are not following one god will criticize them(god).I have seen many people talking and praising God who they are following and criticizing the one they are not following to make their God as supreme God. Sometimes two parties of different god following have hot exchange while talking about their God's supremeness.

So,who will decide what is correct. I think nothing is right or nothing is wrong because something which is right among some societies is definitely be wrong or taboo in some other society.

Like Inter-caste or love marriage is taboo in most of our Indian societies but are in some in society it is allowed and is normal.

Wearing short or tight clothes and dancing is uncivilized for societies but in some societies people do not even think of any uncivilized in dancing. For them dance is a talent and should be shown to world as a entertainment for them.